What does it mean to be a godly wife?

Answer

To define a virtuous wife, we must first consider the meaning of the term virtuous. In 1 Timothy 2:2, Paul associates it with being “peaceful,” “quiet,” and “dignified.” The Bible teaches that the Spirit, present in every believer, produces evident and hidden acts of virtue, such as “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23). The ultimate definition of virtue would be “Christlikeness.” Virtue entails a sincere effort to emulate Christ, to mirror Him in both thought and deed as the apostle Paul endeavored to do «Be ye followers of me, even as I also am of Christ. », (1 Corinthians 11:1). These attributes of a virtuous character are applicable to all believers, regardless of gender. Thankfully, the Bible provides more detailed criteria for what a virtuous woman—specifically, a virtuous wife—looks like.

In the book of Proverbs, a lovely portrait is painted of a virtuous wife. The qualities of a virtuous wife have remained unchanged for millennia. A virtuous wife is one who has earned the complete trust of her husband. He does not fear that she will be enticed by another man, overspend, or waste time on trivial matters. He knows she is dignified, wise, and devoted «The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, So that he shall have no need of spoil. », (Proverbs 31:11,12, 25, 26). He is assured of her encouragement and genuine love because she is not resentful or judgmental. Her husband is respected in the community, and she never speaks ill of him or engages in gossip. Instead, she consistently uplifts him and offers him support.raise. She maintains the household thoroughly and is well-respected herself «She will do him good and not evil All the days of her life. », (Proverbs 31:12,21, 23).

A godly wife spends less time in front of the mirror than in sharing her goods with the poor and needy because she is selfless and benevolent «She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; Yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy. », (Proverbs 31:20,30) «Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: But a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised. », (Proverbs 31:20,30). But she doesn’t neglect herself; she keeps her body and spirit strong and in good health. Although she works hard and keeps long hours, she is not haggard; she cares about beautiful things to enhance herself and her family «She girdeth her loins with strength, And strengtheneth her arms. », (Proverbs 31:17,21, 22).

Contrary to what many believe a biblical portrait of a godly wife to be, Proverbs 31 reveals she is enterprising and ambitious. The Proverbs 31 wife is a small business owner—she makes and sells garments. She makes her own business decisions independently, and she alone decides what to do with her earnings «She considereth a field, and buyeth it: With the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard. », (Proverbs 31:16,24) «She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; And delivereth girdles unto the merchant. », (Proverbs 31:16,24). Notice, however, her earnings do not go toward shoes or bags, but to buy a field where sheOne can cultivate a vineyard, which will benefit the entire family.

Throughout all her endeavors, service, and hard work, the virtuous wife maintains joy. She can perceive that all she does is profitable, which motivates her towards a sense of satisfaction “She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: Her candle goeth not out by night.” (Proverbs 31:18). A virtuous wife does not fret about the future. She looks ahead with a smile because she knows her Lord is in control of everything “Strength and honour are her clothing; And she shall rejoice in time to come.” (Proverbs 31:25,30) “Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: But a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised.” (Proverbs 31:25,30). Verse 30 is pivotal in the entire passage because a woman cannot be a virtuous wife without first fearing the Lord. It is the virtuous wife’s pursuit of Jesus and her abiding in Him that brings forth the fruit of godliness in her life (see John 15:4).

Lastly, a virtuous wife should be submissive to her husband “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.” (Ephesians 5:22). What does a submissive wife resemble? Not what one might expect. The Bible teaches that Jesus submits to His Father “Then answered Jesus and said unto them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, The Son can do nothing of himself, but what he seeth the Father do: for what things soever he doeth, these also doeth the Son likewise.” (John 5:19). Yet Jesus is equal to the Father “I and my Father are one.” (John 10:30).-(John 10:30). Therefore, a submissive wife is not less valuable as a human being; her role is not less important—but it is different. Christians know that Christ is every bit as divine as the Father (and the Holy Spirit), but each plays a different role in redemption. In the same way, men and women each play a different part in marriage. So, for a wife to be submissive to her husband as Christ is submissive to the Father means she willingly allows her husband to lead. Jesus went willingly to the cross, although not without distress «And he went a little further, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt. », (Matthew 26:39). Christ knew the Father’s way was best. A godly wife may find the path of submissiveness painful at times, but following God will always result in spiritual rewards that last for all eternity (1 Timothy 4:7-8).

The Bible equates submissiveness to one’s husband to submissiveness to God «Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. », (Ephesians 5:22). In other words, if a wife cannot submit to her husband, it may be a reflection of her struggle to be submissive to Christ. Submission does not imply weakness; a submissive wife is not “unintelligent” or “unimportant.” Submission requires strength, dignity, and devotion, as we learn from the Proverbs 31 woman.

Proverbs 31 presents the ideal. A woman can be a godly wife without being perfect (we know there is no such thing as human perfection). But as a wife grows more intimate in her relationship with Christ, she will grow increasingly godly in her marriage. Godliness is often in opposition to what secular society says a woman should be.

It is a goal that every woman should strive to achieve. Nevertheless, as women of God, our primary focus must always be on what is pleasing to God.