Brian Houston speaks out for the first time after the negative impact he gave Hillsong by his resignation

For the first time since Brian Houston’s resignation as Hillsong’s global pastor was announced due to multiple scandals over conduct and cover-up of abuse and the uproar it caused within the ministry, the former pastor spoke out.

The Christian news site in Australia, Eternity News, was able to obtain the email in which Houston apologizes to the members of the church for the repercussions that this situation has caused inside and outside of Hillsong.

Within the text, the former pastor said he felt  “so deeply sorry” for his failings and that there was “no one to blame but myself for the position I find myself in”.

“To those impacted directly by my actions, I am sorry for the pain I have caused you,” he wrote. 

He also expressed that he feels very sorry for the pain he caused his congregation and his own family.

“To my wonderful, forgiving and gracious family who I love more than anything, I hate hurting you,” he said.

“Bobbie, in my eyes you are the most Christ-like, beautiful, loyal and faithful person alive today. It crushes me to see your heart breaking as we navigate this season, letting go of so much that is precious to you. I love my family and it pains me deeply to see you navigating these waters,” he continued. 

There, he also expressed that he is really committed to finding a solution to his problems with alcohol.

“Over many years of constant pressure, opposition, challenges, and attacks, accompanied by my personal turmoil over my father’s evil, many people have asked – ‘How do you continue to get up, cope, and keep going?’ And now we know the answer. I haven’t coped very well at all,” he said.

“I openly admit that alcohol has been no friend and I am determined to relegate it to my past,” he continued.

 “Please be assured, I accept full responsibility for my actions and I have no one to blame but myself for the position I find myself in. It may be some time before we see light at the end of this tunnel, but I know God has not finished with us yet.” 

To conclude, he expressed that he still does not know what God has prepared for him in the coming years, but even so, he does not stop believing with great hope that what awaits him will be “brilliant.”

“I still have a sense of bright hope for the future and I know God is not finished with me yet. We have no intention of retiring. As Bobbie would say, “the final chapters of our lives are not yet written,” he continued.

“‘Thank you for the immense honour of pastoring Hillsong Church these past 39 years. What a journey. What wonderful memories and joy. What powerful testimonies and stories of Christ’s transformation and grace. I still believe “the best is yet to come’… and our prayer for your health, well-being and God’s perfect Will in your life continues.” 

Read the complete email below: