When is it necessary to rebuke another believer?

Response

To rebuke someone is to criticize him or her sharply. The Greek word most often translated as “rebuke” in the New Testament is elegchó. In its fullest sense, elegchó means “to reprimand and convict by exposing (sometimes publicly) a wrong.” There are times when all of us need to be rebuked, and there are times when a believer needs to rebuke another believer.

We usually perceive a rebuke in a negative light, but Proverbs 27:5–6 says, “Better is open rebuke than hidden love. Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses.” Paul instructs Titus, as an overseer of the church, to “speak, exhort, and rebuke with all authority” «These things speak, exhort, and rebuke with all authority. Let no man despise thee.», (Titus 2:15), indicating that all three activities are equally important. We understand that we should always encourage one another and speak the truth (1 Thessalonians 5:11; Ephesians 4:25), but how do we determine when to rebuke another believer?

Scriptural rebuke begins in the heart. Before we confront anyone about anything, we should first examine our own motives. First Corinthians 16:14 says, “Let everything be done in love.” That includes rebuke. There is a right way and a wrong way to rebuke someone. Incorrect rebuking arises from pride, anger, malice, jealousy, or another selfish attitude. The aim of an unscriptural rebuke is to harm, shame, or otherwise hurt a Christian brother or sister. Often, hypocrisy is involved. Most of the Bible’s warnings against judging others relate to those who condemn others for the very things they do themselves (Matthew 7:3-5). Paul wrote, “I discipline my body and make it my

Slave, so that, after I have preached to others, I myself will not be disqualified” «but I keep under my body, and bring it into subjection: lest that by any means, when I have preached to others, I myself should be a castaway.», (1 Corinthians 9:27).

Jesus gave clear instructions for handling situations in which a brother or sister is caught up in sin: “If your brother or sister sins, go and point out their fault, just between the two of you. If they listen to you, you have won them over” « Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. », (Matthew 18:15). There is discernment implied in this verse. We are not to be watchdogs over each other because we all sin in many ways every day (1 John 1:8; James 3:2). We all sin in thought, word, attitude, or motivation. But when another believer is choosing sin that harms themselves, someone else, or the body of Christ, we are to intervene. A rebuke is necessary at times, as we must look out for each other. James 5:20 says, “Whoever turns a sinner from the error of their way will save them from death and cover over a multitude of sins.” Confrontation may be difficult, but it is not loving to allow a professing Christian to continue in sin that will bring God’s consequences upon them, their family, or their church.

Matthew 18 goes on to clarify what is to be done in church discipline if a confronted believer refuses to listen to a loving rebuke. Jesus says, “But if they will not listen, take one or two others along, so that ‘every matter may be established by the testimony of two or three witnesses.’ If they still refuse to listen, tell it to the church; and if they refuse to listen, the church should treat them as they would a pagan or a tax collector” (Matthew 18:16-17).

Even to the church, treat them as you would a pagan or a tax collector” (verses 16–17). This may sound harsh to our tolerance-saturated minds, but this is Jesus talking. The purity of His church is of utmost importance to Him. People who want to claim His name while defiling His reputation must be rebuked, not overlooked or excused.

If the church as a whole took Jesus’ words more seriously, our voice would be more respected in the world. When we neglect to address grievous sins in the church, we appear to take sin lightly. Skeptics can’t respect our claim to honor the Bible as God’s Word while we ignore those of our number who are overtly disobeying it.

Sometimes, believers are hesitant to rebuke those who need it because of abuses in the past. Some churches or pastors have been overly eager to rebuke others or have used Scripture to humiliate and ostracize those who disagreed with them. Such judgmental behavior has led some church leaders to forego the application of the Matthew 18 standards entirely.

A simple checklist can help individuals know when it may be necessary to rebuke a sinning Christian. We should never be hasty or rash in a rebuke. We should evaluate each situation carefully and prayerfully and ask ourselves these questions:

1. Is my life free from similar sin? «Therefore thou art inexcusable, O man, whosoever thou art that judgest: for wherein thou judgest another, thou condemnest thyself; for thou that judgest doest the same things. », (Romans 2:1)

2. Do I have a relationship with this person that allows me to speak into his life? «Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ. », (Galatians 6:2)

3. Is my motive that of restoration rather than condemnation? «Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one

In the spirit of gentleness; considering yourself, lest you also be tempted. », (Galatians 6:1)

4. Would I be willing to receive rebuke in the same way? «Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. », (Matthew 7:12)

5. Do I understand Scripture well enough to discern how and why this person is violating it? «Study to show yourself approved unto God, a workman that needs not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth. », (2 Timothy 2:15)

6. Am I prepared to approach my pastor or elders on this person’s behalf if he refuses to listen to me?

7. Am I willing to commit to praying for this person’s healing and restoration before and after I confront him? «Watch and pray, that you enter not into temptation: the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak. », (Matthew 26:41)

8. Is this offense truly a sin or simply an act of immaturity or preference? «with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love; », (Ephesians 4:2)

9. Am I acting in love? «Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. », (1 Corinthians 13:1)

Galatians 6:1 reminds us, “Brothers and sisters, if someone is caught in a sin, you who live by the Spirit should restore that person gently. But watch yourselves, or you also may be tempted.” When we are

When called to confront or rebuke a fellow believer, we must always do so with an attitude of humility, recognizing that we too are prone to sin. We can heed Jesus’ wise counsel in this and every other circumstance: “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you” «Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets. », (Matthew 7:12).