What was the relationship between David and Jonathan?

Answer

We know from 1 Samuel 18:1 that Jonathan loved David. Second Samuel 1:26 records David’s lament after Jonathan’s death, in which he said that his love for Jonathan was more wonderful than the love of a woman. Some use these two passages to suggest a homosexual relationship between David and Jonathan. This interpretation, however, should be rejected for at least three reasons.

First, the Hebrew word for “love” used here covers a broad range of meanings and does not mean “romantic” or “sexual” love unless the context demands it. Forms of the same word are used for loving God «and showing mercy unto thousands of them that love me, and keep my commandments. », (Exodus 20:6), loving one’s neighbor as oneself «Thou shalt not avenge, nor bear any grudge against the children of thy people, but thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself: I am the LORD. », (Leviticus 19:18), treating foreigners well «But the stranger that dwelleth with you shall be unto you as one born among you, and thou shalt love him as thyself; for ye were strangers in the land of Egypt: I am the LORD your God. », (Leviticus 19:34), sharing friendship «All my inward friends abhorred me: And they whom I loved are turned against me. », (Job 19:19), having diplomatic ties «And Hiram king of Tyre sent his servants unto Solomon; for he had heard that they had anointed him king in the room of his father: for Hiram was ever a lover of David. », (1 Kings 5:1), taking pleasure in the work of a subordinate.

In «And David came to Saul, and stood before him: and he loved him greatly; and he became his armourbearer. », (1 Samuel 16:21), and even “loving” inanimate things «He that loveth pleasure shall be a poor man: He that loveth wine and oil shall not be rich. », (Proverbs 21:17).

Second, David’s comparison of his relationship with Jonathan with that of women is probably a reference to his experience with King Saul’s daughters. He was promised one of Saul’s daughters for killing Goliath. The first daughter was abruptly given to another man. The second daughter was promised, but Saul continued to add conditions to the deal, hoping to see David killed in battle «And Saul said to David, Behold my elder daughter Merab, her will I give thee to wife: only be thou valiant for me, and fight the LORD’s battles. For Saul said, Let not mine hand be upon him, but let the hand of the Philistines be upon him. », (1 Samuel 18:17,25) «And Saul said, Thus shall ye say to David, The king desireth not any dowry, but an hundred foreskins of the Philistines, to be avenged of the king’s enemies. But Saul thought to make David fall by the hand of the Philistines. », (1 Samuel 18:17,25). The loyalty and camaraderie David had with Jonathan came with no conditions and was of greater value than the companionship of Saul’s daughter.

Third, the Bible clearly and consistently denounces homosexuality (Genesis 1:26-27;Leviticus 18:22;Leviticus 20:13;Romans 1:18-25). Extolling a homosexual love between David and Jonathan would be contradicting.The prohibitions of it are found throughout the Bible.

The friendship between David and Jonathan was a covenantal relationship. In 1 Samuel 18:1-5, we read of David and Jonathan forming an agreement. In this agreement, Jonathan was to be second in command in David’s future reign, and David was to protect Jonathan’s family (1 Samuel 20:16-17, 42;23:16-18).

Clearly, these two men were also very good friends. In their relationship, we can see at least three qualities of true friendship. First, they sacrificed for one another. In 1 Samuel 18:4, we read that Jonathan gave David his clothes and military garb. The significance of this gift was that Jonathan recognized that David would one day be king of Israel. Rather than being envious or jealous, Jonathan submitted to God’s will and sacrificed his own right to the throne. Second, in 1 Samuel 19:1-3, we read of Jonathan’s loyalty toward and defense of David. King Saul told his followers to kill David. Jonathan rebuked his father and recalled David’s faithfulness to him in killing Goliath. Finally, Jonathan and David were also free to express their emotions with one another. In 1 Samuel 20, we read of a plan concocted by Jonathan to reveal his father’s plans toward David. Jonathan was going to practice his archery. If he told his servant that the arrows he shot were to the side of the target, David was safe. If Jonathan told his servant that the arrows were beyond the target, David was to leave and not return. Jonathan told the servant that the arrows were beyond the target, meaning that David should flee. After releasing his servant, Jonathan found David and the two men cried together.

Rather than being evidence for a homosexual relationship in the Bible, the account of David and Jonathan is an example of true biblical friendship. True friendship, according to the Bible, involves loyalty, sacrifice, compromise, and yes, emotional attachment. That is what

We should learn from David and Jonathan. The notion that David and Jonathan were engaging in homosexual or bisexual practices lacks biblical support.