Is it wrong for men to be effeminate or for women to be masculine?

Answer

To address this question, we must first clarify certain terms. Individuals vary; we are not identical beings distinguished solely by gender. A slender man with a naturally gentle voice might be perceived as effeminate by some, yet he could be just as content with his masculinity as a stereotypical macho man. A man’s physique and inherent traits are divine gifts and should not be subject to mockery. The same principle applies to women. While some women exhibit more traditional femininity, aligning with societal expectations of womanhood, a tomboy can honor God just as much as a more girly girl by embracing her unique design and using her talents to glorify Him.

For the context of this discussion, we will define effeminacy (in men) and masculinity (in women) as lifestyle choices that contradict an individual’s God-given gender. In the Old Testament, the term translated as “effeminate” is also associated with male prostitutes (Deuteronomy 23:17;1 Kings 22:46). In the New Testament, the Greek term for “effeminate” conveys the meaning of “soft and delicate.” First Corinthians 6:9 distinguishes this term from homosexuality, indicating they are not interchangeable. An “effeminate” man in this context is one who has rejected his masculinity and identifies as female. This individual may or may not be sexually active but has deliberately chosen to live as a “soft and delicate” person, disregarding his God-given identity as a man. He adopts feminine characteristics and interacts with other males in a manner typical of women.

When God created male and female “male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created.”, (Genesis 5:2).

He created more than mere physical differences. Men and women were created to fulfill differing roles in creation and in our relationship with the Lord. Rejecting those God-assigned roles is a symptom of rebellion against our Creator. When people defy God and decide they can live any way they choose, God allows them to follow their perverted lusts to their natural consequences. Romans 1:26–27 says, “That is why God abandoned them to their shameful desires. Even the women turned against the natural way to have sex and instead indulged in sex with each other. And the men, instead of having normal sexual relations with women, burned with lust for each other. Men did shameful things with other men, and as a result of this sin, they suffered within themselves the penalty they deserved” (NLT).

Perversion escalates when women and men abandon their God-ordained identities and try to adopt the characteristics of the opposite gender. Men become like women, and women become like men. The sin lies in our choices, not our natural differences. We must be careful not to assign certain traits to each gender based upon our own cultural norms. In some cultures, men holding hands or kissing on the cheek is a sign of friendship, not an indication of femininity or homosexuality. In Jesus’ day, men wore robes and reclined at the table, lying upon each other’s chests «Then Peter, turning about, seeth the disciple whom Jesus loved following; which also leaned on his breast at supper, and said, Lord, which is he that betrayeth thee? », (John 21:20). But these cultural differences in no way indicate a rejection of masculinity.

The phenomenon of gender reversals is escalating in our day with sex-change surgeries and demands that the “transgendered” be accommodated. People are abandoning their natural identities and mentally identifying as any gender they choose. Society is indulging this behavior, which leads to even more confusion.

For those struggling with gender confusion, the solution is not to change their physical bodies but to allow the Holy Spirit to transform their hearts “that he no longer should live the rest of his time in the flesh to the lusts of men, but to the will of God.”, (1 Peter 4:2). When we fully submit to the lordship of Jesus, we seek to follow His plan for us rather than our own “I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.”, (Galatians 2:20).

For a man to reject his gender and identify as a woman, or for a woman to forsake her gender and present herself as a man, is incorrect. It goes against God’s design of creating male and female. Deuteronomy 22:5 states, “A woman must not wear men’s clothing, nor a man wear women’s clothing, for the LORD your God detests anyone who does this.” This directive was more about preserving the sanctity of being male or female than about clothing. Romans 1 reveals that gender confusion is a symptom of a deeper issue. When individuals disregard God’s authority and exalt themselves as their own gods, disorder ensues. Verses 21 and 22 highlight the problem: “For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. Although they claimed to be wise, they became fools.”

Believing that we are wiser than God is the path to foolishness. When a man challenges his masculinity or a woman denies her femininity, it indicates a more serious sin: rejecting God’s ultimate authority. The closer we draw to God, the more we can embrace our gender identity. Both genders exhibit certain characteristics and roles that reflect the image of God.In aspects of God’s character in a unique way. When we pervert His choice for us, we limit the opportunities He gives us to demonstrate the glory of being created in His image “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.” (Genesis 1:27).