How can a Christian avoid being a diva?

Response

The term “diva” is derived from the Latin word “divus,” which translates to “god.” Originally, in English, diva referred to any popular female performer, particularly a singer. Over time, it has evolved to describe “a self-centered, moody, and demanding individual who struggles to collaborate effectively with others.” As Christians, who are called to avoid being self-centered, moody, or demanding, we should steer clear of embodying diva-like behavior.

In today’s self-centered society, diva mentalities are often promoted. Advertisements constantly urge us to “achieve your full potential,” insisting that we “deserve the finest things” and that “nothing is too extravagant” for us. By following such advice, both men and women can develop self-absorption, a sense of entitlement, and challenging personalities. Regrettably, Christians are susceptible to adopting this mindset just as much as non-believers. However, behaving like a diva contradicts the principles taught by Christ.

A diva attitude may manifest when we don’t get our way, feel entitled to more than we receive, or disagree with the direction set by leadership. Differing opinions are essential in healthy relationships, and how we manage these differences can either strengthen or weaken the bond. Acting like a diva is never in alignment with God’s will.

Divas often serve as the source of conflicts, gossip, and even divisions within churches. They sow discord in the body of Christ, workplaces, social circles, or within families. For instance, Betty becomes so upset after not being chosen as the leader of the women’s ministry that she starts attending a different church where her talents are valued. Frank complains about losing his front-row parking spot to accommodate handicapped parking. A couple decides to leave a family gathering due to their irritation with the presence of children. All divas share a common trait—an inflated sense of self-importance.

Divas are not a modern phenomenon. Even in the early church, dealing with diva-like behaviors was a challenge.

As Diotrephes, whom John described as one who “loves to be first” «I wrote unto the church: but Diotrephes, who loveth to have the preeminence among them, receiveth us not. », (3 John 1:9). Paul warned against being a diva in Romans 12:3: “Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment.” To have sober judgment, we must be willing to see ourselves the way God does. We should not compare ourselves with those around us but with the perfection of Jesus «For we dare not make ourselves of the number, or compare ourselves with some that commend themselves: but they measuring themselves by themselves, and comparing themselves among themselves, are not wise. », (2 Corinthians 10:12). It’s hard to feel lofty when we “consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself” «For consider him that endured such contradiction of sinners against himself, lest ye be wearied and faint in your minds. », (Hebrews 12:3, ESV). It is His character that Christians are told to emulate. When we start to act like a diva, we should remember Christ’s humble servitude. Jesus “did not come to be served, but to serve” «even as the Son of man came not to be ministered unto, but to minister, and to give his life a ransom for many. », (Matthew 20:28).

How does a diva attitude compare with a servant attitude?

• Divas are self-focused; servants are others-focused «Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others. », (Philippians 2:4).• Divas are self-important; servants

Believers aim to emphasize the significance of Christ «He must increase, but I must decrease. », (John 3:30).
• Divas demand their rights; servants surrender their rights to the care of the Lord «I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me. », (Galatians 2:20).
• Divas treat their opinions as godly convictions; servants discern the distinction between personal opinion and spiritual conviction «For I determined not to know any thing among you, save Jesus Christ, and him crucified. », (1 Corinthians 2:2).
• Divas justify their own sin while criticizing others; servants mourn over all sin and live in a continual state of repentance «Thou lovest righteousness, and hatest wickedness: Therefore God, thy God, hath anointed thee with the oil of gladness above thy fellows. », (Psalm 45:7).

Second Corinthians 10:18 states, “For it is not the one who commends himself who is approved, but the one whom the Lord commends.” Overcoming a diva attitude involves demolishing our “right” to be respected and admired and replacing it with a desire to please the Lord. We need to ask the Lord to reveal our sin to us as He sees it. We can also choose to humble ourselves by volunteering for tasks that offer no personal gain. For instance, someone striving to overcome a diva attitude might volunteer to vacuum after a youth ministry event, assist an elderly person with groceries, or clean up litter on a hiking trail. Such acts are even more beneficial when done anonymously.

Avoiding a diva attitude involves a shift from self-centeredness to servanthood, mirroring the humility of Christ.A diva is related to what the Bible calls dying to the flesh (see Romans 6:8-14; Luke 9:23). However, because eliminating our fleshly desires is painful, many Christians simply teach their flesh some manners. They believe they are living godly lives because they are not engaged in certain obvious sins—until the diva attitude emerges. Their preference is disregarded when selecting a group activity, a restaurant stops serving their favorite dish, or their employer does not align with their ideas, and the old petulant, fractious peevishness resurfaces. The diva has returned.

Avoiding the diva mentality begins with recognizing our potential to be a diva. Pride is the basis for a diva attitude, so the second step is confessing our pride to the Lord and seeking His help in overcoming it. A third and challenging step is to view ourselves as crucified with Christ and look for humble ways to serve others. Divas often conceal their pride by opting for public acts of service for recognition or inundating social media with virtue signaling and “humble brag” selfies. It is preferable to volunteer for an unpopular task that will go unnoticed.

Peter offers some excellent advice on how to avoid being a diva: “All of you, clothe yourselves with humility toward one another, because, ‘God opposes the proud but shows favor to the humble’” (1 Peter 5:5; cf: Proverbs 3:34).